Things Are Changing, But It's For The Better (Sorry I'm late!)

Lately, I've been having to do a lot of stuff involving high school, and it's got me really excited. I can't wait to go to a new school where I can meet new people, and do new things, join clubs, take new classes, I just can't wait. Next year, I'm going to be taking things like clothing, painting, orchestra, Spanish 2 (which I'm not the most excited about) and of course the required things. I am really excited to go to a new school, but at the same time I'm really bummed. Next year, a lot of my friends will be going to a different high school than me, because our Junior High filters into two high schools. It's a bummer really. I'm happy that they are excited for their school, but I wish that I could just take them all with me, so that we wouldn't get split up. I'm hoping though, that we're close enough that our friendships won't break, but we'll see. I can only hope for the best.
I can't believe that I'm a freshman this year, it just doesn't seem right, and then on top of that, this fall I will be a sophomore... It's Crazy! If feels like just yesterday that I was starting my 1st day of 7th grade, like only yesterday I was getting lost in an extremely simple school. I kind of miss the simpleness of it. Just 3 years ago I was in the final months of elementary. It seems so crazy to think that I've grown up so much from then. Since then, I have learned so many new things, and met so many new people. I'm so grateful for what I have today. Every time I wish things were different, that I could change something, I think about how every person who has hurt me, has made me stronger, and how I am so lucky to have the life that I do. It's hard to want something else. Yet, I still do, and it makes me feel selfish sometimes, but then I realize that it's not like I can change things, and in the end, I don't think I would honestly want to. Anyway, back to the original topic: High School.
I can't believe that this year I am going to start driving, and eventually have my license. I feel like things are changing so fast, and it actually kind of makes me laugh. I think about how silly my sisters and I used to be, and how we still are, but in different ways. It's funny to look at how much people change, and grow over such a short amount of time. Once upon a time, the biggest thing we would fight about was a plastic barbie locker, and now we all have such different schedules, that we don't often get time when everyone is home. It just amazes me how things change. Thinking about how I will be in high school later this year does make me nervous, but it makes me excited, and I can't wait. I used to be afraid of change, and I still kind of am, but this is going to be good, and if it's not, I'll make it be good. :)

3 hours in a car? No Problem!

So... I know this post is a little late, sorry for that. Anyway, today has been crazy. Everyone knows that Utah is really popular for it's ski/snowboarding resorts. Well, today just proved that to me even further. A few years ago, around 2005 my family and I went tubing for the first time. Just in case you don't know what that is, just think about it. You hop in a tube, (you know like the round circular things?), and then you go down a hill of snow. So basically it's sledding, but in a tube. Anyway, so about 6 years ago we went for the first time, and we had a blast. I even managed to loose my hat in the middle of one of the tracks, and for quite a while almost anytime someone went down the hill they would hop out of their tube in the middle of the track, and then try to grab my hat. This went on for a while, and if you've been tubing before, you know how long it takes to get to the top of the hill, and then you have to wait out the lines. So, it was pretty strange, and awesome watching all these random people jumping out of their tubes to try to grab my hat. Eventually, after a lot of failures from a lot of different people, I had given up all hope of ever getting my hat back, but one of my sisters just had to try one more time. So, standing at the bottom of the tracks, we watched her go down the hill, jump out of her tube in the middle of it, and finally my hat was retrieved. I think it was at that point that everyone started cheering. We finished up the day without any incidents, and then we went home freezing, and soaking wet. It was a lot of fun.
The next year, 2006 we decided to go again, but I couldn't actually go tubing. I was having my heart surgery in a month (a story for a different time), and so I wasn't allowed to go because I was supposed to be taking it easy. So my sisters went tubing with my step dad, and me and my mom went and sat in McDonald's. Fun right? It actually was though. If I'm remembering this right (I don't always have the best memory) at the end of the day, right before we were going to leave, my mom let me go once. So I followed my step dad to the area where you and your tube are pulled up the hill, and up we went. Once the ride was over, you know the one to get up the hill, there was still quite a hike, so my step dad, being as awesome as he is, pulled me in my tube the rest of the way because I was supposed to be taking it easy. We got to the top, I went down and it was a blast.
Anyway, so this year we wanted to go again because we hadn't gone in a long time. Well, it's a pretty long drive up there, about an hour and a half, and we were really excited to go. Sadly, we were missing three of our "troop" because they were working, and my mom has a bad back, so she decided to stay. Anyway, so after a long drive up, we were so excited to get out of the car. So we went into the resort, and waited while my step dad went to go buy the tickets, and then... Bad news. They were sold out. With one last sliver of hope, we drove down a grocery store, hoping they would have a few more tickets, but at the time, it was 2:30 and sadly they didn't have tickets with times until 5:00. So, we drove one and a half hours back home. Making a total of three hours in the car. So, we got home, removed a few layers of coats and scarfs, and decided to go to a movie. The movie? Chronicle. Let's just say it was interesting.... Anyway, I should probably wrap this up. So basically, today has been crazy. Oh, and did I mention that one of my favorite people, my step sister, came out from Georgia yesterday? Yeah, so it's been a pretty great weekend.

Sisters.... What Would I Do Without Them?

They're my best friends, my worst enemies (sometimes), and the people I couldn't live without. It has always shocked me when people say that they hate having a sister, or that they can't stand their sister. Yeah, there will always be times when you are in fights with them, or the times when you really just can't stand them, but what about all the other times? I have tons and tons of amazing memories with my sisters, whether it is just summer movie nights, childhood memories, or whatever. They're there for me when I need it most.
Just a warning, this post is going to be full of cheese, but sometimes you can't help it. One of my favorite memories with my sisters is just an extremely simple one, any of the days we spent at the park when we were little. We would run around and around the park, playing tag, pushing each other on the "merry go round", ( if you don't know what I mean, and really want to know, look up "playground merry go round". You'll quickly understand.), tossing frisbees at each other, kicking around a soccer ball, or feeding the ducks.
Now, we're all a lot older, and we don't see each other much. It's really sad, but it makes me grateful for the time we do get together. Now, it may just be 10 minutes or so in between everyone's busy schedules. However, there are nights, like tonight, where most of us are home, and we can spend hours together. Nights like tonight are my favorite, because it means that once again I get to spend time with the most important people in my life. I don't know what I'd do without them. I love nights like tonight, but they also make me wish for the times when we were little. I want to go back to when all that mattered was who had what barbie. I mean seriously, when was the last time you had a problem as simple as that? Probably a long time.
I don't always want to go all the way back to when we were little though. Sometimes I just want to go back a few years, because then was the time when we were all at "mature" ages, though we didn't always act mature. I miss when we would go on long car rides and sing at the top of our lungs to songs like Waka Waka by Shakira, The one's for the girls by Martina McBride, and a lot of others. I miss the somewhat simpler times from then. Now it's sounding like I don't like anything in my life now, and that's not true. I love my life right now. I just miss my family. I'm grateful for the time we get to spend together, and I couldn't ask for more from them right now. I can't wait for when we are all older, and we get to spend the time together then, like how we used to. I  miss the past, I'm enjoying the present, and I'm eager for the memories we'll make in the future. <3

Reflecting on the Past

When we were little, around 4 or so, it was all about who had the biggest box of crayons, and whether or not it had the sharpener with it. Then we grew up a little and things soon progressed to who had the coolest toys. Elementary school came, and we suddenly needed to have the most friends (many people still think this is the most important thing). Then it was a contest between having the best boy/girlfriend. When you think about it... It's all a little ridiculous, but yet, I want to relive it.
When we were little, we just wanted to get older so people would stop treating us like the kids we were. We wanted to get to Junior High where you could wear whatever shoes you want. Never once did we stop to look at what we were leaving behind. That's honestly one of my biggest regrets... (So far. I'm not being all dramatic.. Or at least I'm not trying to be. I just wish things were simple once again.) Anyway, I want to go back to when all that mattered was who had the biggest crayon box. I want things to S T O P changing. But, I guess I finally got what I wanted. We all did.
When you think about it, it's ridiculous. A lot of  kids, me included when I was little, just want to get older so they can have privileges or privacy. Then when you're older, you just want to go back to when there were no limits on what your imagination could create. It didn't matter that it was 10 in the morning, because that just meant you had a full day ahead of you. A day to do whatever you wanted. Not a deadline, or homework assignment, or work.
As I went on a walk today with one of my sisters, somehow we got on the topic of days you would relive if you could. There are T O N S of days that I could choose, whether it would be walking through endless fields with a friend, a camping trip with my family, , watching Scooby Doo with your friend at their grandparent's farm on a stormy day, or even just family game nights. I wish that back then I had told myself to slow down, and actually enjoy the simplicity of life. But, even if I had told myself that, I probably wouldn't have listened.
Thinking back on these memories makes me sad. Sad for the friends I lost, the moments I never actually appreciated, and the things I would change if I could. Meanwhile, I wouldn't change a thing. ( I know that sounds ridiculous. Yeah, I miss some friends, but losing them is what made me ME.) I wish I could change things, but at the same time, if I did, my whole life could be different. Who knows.
So. To all the people who hurt me, laughed with me, loved me, and put up with me when I was a pain in the butt. Thank you. You helped make me who I am today, even if some of it hurt. I may be looking towards the past, but I heading towards the future.

"I don't want my pain erased. As wretched as it is,

I need my pain. It makes me who I am. It makes me Grumpy."

- Grumpy, from 'Once Upon a Time'