A Whole Lot of Nothing... Just Kidding!

Everyone looks forward to Christmas. Children set out plates of cookies and mugs of milk for Santa, and when they wake up they have new toys in boxes, which are then wrapped in decorative paper and then placed under a real/fake tree. It sounds ridiculous when you talk about it that way, but really for many people, it's the most magical time of the year.
This year, family was really different for my family. We have always been lucky to have each other, and everyday we think about this. This year, my Mom was bummed when she found out she had to work on Christmas. She was really worried that  we would all be upset on Christmas, were we sad that we wouldn't have the whole day together, but we worked it out.
The morning started when we woke up at around 6 A.M. all eager to go upstairs. The night before, we (four of my sisters and I.) had all slept in the basement together, as we have done every year since I can remember. When we finally were aloud to go upstairs we were all shocked, but excited to see 5 "Ugly Dolls" lined up on the couch. (Check out the "Ugly Dolls" here.)
Laughter continued as we passed each other various presents. My sisters and I had put together a movie date basket for our parents, and we were extremely happy when they opened it and became excited for their date. The morning was a lot of fun, and after we had thoroughly made a mess of the living room, we played with our new "toys" and "gadgets".
We were spending as much time together as we could until my mom had to go to work at 8 A.M. We laughed, smiled, and sometimes freaked out, as we opened the various exciting presents. That's not what mattered most to us though. All we wanted was to spend time together, so we spent the morning laughing and talking together.

Sadly, 8 A.M. approached a lot faster than we expected, and before we knew it, we were giving our mom hugs and saying goodbye, wishing her a good day at work, and that we'd see her at 6, maybe sooner if she got off early. Then we cleaned up the mess of boxes, papers, ribbons, plastic, and various other trash then headed off to our cousins house.
When we got there we were met by screams of joy and surprise from our cousins, as well as their screaming as they try to be heard above one another. Because there is five of us, there were plenty of us to go around as our cousins, ages 5, 9 (I think), and 13, eagerly showed us their presents.
Several hours went by, and we were saying goodbye to our cousins to head to our grandmas house about 20-30 minutes away. When we got there, we were greeted by the sweet surprise of our mom getting off early, We spent a few more hours there laughing with cousins and aunts and uncles then headed home.
Even though today was different than usual, it was still a lot of fun, and I got to see my family. I am so grateful for them. I couldn't have asked for a better day. Thanks Mom and Bill!

Letters for Literature Contest Entry

For an assignment in one of my classes, we had to enter this contest. This was the letter I wrote for it.

Dear Jay Asher,

            In the past year, I read your book, 13 Reasons Why, and it completely changed my outlook on life and self harm. Just a few years ago, when I was about 10 or 11, my best friend, since kindergarten, texted me saying he cut himself. A little naive and not wanting to think about the options, I asked him how, and then hoped he would say it had been an accident while he was making dinner. He didn’t. When I was thrown headfirst into the knowledge of self harm, I was shocked, afraid, and worried.

            I no longer talk to that friend, and every day I worry that he might still do self harm. That’s why your book means so much to me. As I read the book, I think I was just as shocked as Clay when he heard the thoughts going through Hannah’s head as she explained her reasons for suicide. The story captured me and managed to terrify me and captivate me at the same time.

            Your book made me think harder about the reasons why people often resort to self harm and suicide. At the time my friend told me, I didn’t understand, I was naive, so I could never completely help him. Now, if we still talked, I think I could help him through it.

            As the tapes went on, I grew more and more shocked. Then it was Clay’s turn and I sobbed right along with him. Each word Hannah said tore into his heart, and then mine as well. It made me realize the importance of speaking out even when you’re afraid. I’m trying to get back in touch with my friend because we haven’t talked since we were about 13, so a little less than 3 years ago. If he were to still commit self harm, or consider suicide, I would blame myself for it, just like Clay did. It would be like I unconsciously sat back and watched as he self corrupted.

            Your book has also helped me through a lot of hard times, while it’s not a happy upbeat book, it’s real and relatable. Whenever I’m in a hard patch, I pick up your book. Most of the time I flip to Clay’s tape, and sob the whole way through it. It made me realize that even though I may feel alone sometimes, there’s always someone out there that cares. I just have to wait the tough spots out and be strong, for those who do.

            Your book has inspired me to never let anyone go on without knowing that they are loved. Every day I tell me friends how my I appreciate and care  about them, I tell my family how much I love them, and I tell myself that even though it might not always feel like people understand me or care, they do and every day should be lived like it’s your last. Many people consider people who self harm pathetic, or weak, but really they just need help, but are too afraid to ask. Thank you for showing me how valuable life is, and that I need to try to reach out to people, even though I may not always be comfortable. Your words inspired me to be a better person overall, and I am so glad I read your book. It gave me a different and better outlook on things.

Sincerely,

 A Constant Reader (No, on the letter, I did not sign as this. It had my name, but since the internet is dangerous, this is what you get to see.)

Future

So, This was supposed to go up last night, but I accidentally posted this on the wrong blog, so here it is:
I was asked this the other day, and it really made me think... Below is my response.

Where do you see yourself in three years? As a senior in high school, what do you think you will be considering for your future? What career do you think you will want to go into? What colleges will you want to apply to? What will you want to study in college? How do you think you will change between now and December of 2014?


In three years, I can see myself finally knowing who I really am. I'll finally have the group of friends that I trust, and that I know won't stab me in the back like some have before. I'll be the person that, while few, people/friends will be able to talk to me about anything and everything. I want to be the type of person that people trust easily. I want to get good grades, so I'll likely be following in my sisters footsteps (for example, when I walk into class the first day of high school, a teacher will read my name and say, "Oh! Your a Randquist!" Why yes, yes I am, and that has never changed, Or "Your Carley, Madi, and Emily's little sister aren't you?" Well, as far as I've been told, yeah I am, I've never seen the documents saying so though, and sometimes I wonder how I can be related to them.) I also hope that I will be working towards graduating with an associates degree.
I can see  myself going into teaching, but I'm not sure what. I like kids, but not too little, so I could see myself as say... A third grade, maybe second grade teacher. I also like using a lot of sarcasm though, and I appreciate it when people actually understand it, so I could also see myself as being a junior high or high school teacher, maybe an art class of sorts, or a math class. Yeah, I know that sounds nerdy, but I know that a lot of people struggle in math, so if I became a math teacher, I would do my best to help all students. I could also see myself as a English teacher, I've always loved reading, and always encourage my friends to read books that I thought were good.
As for college, I have no idea at all. I guess it would depend on what I am going to be studying.
I can see myself driving constantly, hopefully having my own car. I'll probably have a job, let me rephrase that. I better have a job, that makes good money, and isn't something related to greasy food.
I'll probably have a million things to pay, and I'll probably be lonely a lot of the time seeing as my three older sisters might move out by then, with 2 of them being 22 in three years, and the other being probably around 21 depending on the time of year. I will be 18 or 19, also depending on the time of year, and hopefully things will be going good overall in life. The thing I'm most afraid of right now with the future? Losing friends when we split and go to high school. I already lost some in the transition to junior high, and I don't want to loose more. My friends mean the world to me, (other than my family of course), and I hope I'm not going to loose them.